As our car slowed through the small North Georgia town of Baldwin, just as we passed the Stew-N-Que restaurant, an old gentleman in overalls and a ball cap on the sidewalk raised his hand and waved at us with a smile. I waved back with a smile from the driver’s seat.
“Do you know him?” my sister asked.
“No, never met him,” I replied simply.
“Then why did y’all wave at each other?” she asked.
“Just being polite and kind,” I responded with a smile. “You know that’s what we grew up doing here in the south,” I continued.
“I know it’s common here, but just never thought about why we do it,” she added.
It was an inconsequential moment and conversation seven years ago. We switched to other topics on our long drive back home to Gainesville Georgia. However, I’m reminded of that event and conversation today as we approach the 4th of July, our American Independence Day. I’m sadly not feeling very patriotic today because I feel our country has forgotten what it means to be kind to one another. These current feelings prompted me to reflect on what it means to be kind, why we should be kind, how we as a nation have been kind before, how did we lose our ability to be kind to one another, what are the benefits of being kind, and how can we make America kind again?
Being kind to me is reflected in treating others as you would like to be treated, regardless of our differences, and treating each other with respect and dignity. It is best summed up in similar common language from different faith traditions on the golden rule (see image below):
The meaning of kindness may also be described as a feeling of generosity, consideration, and compassion towards others, without expecting anything in return. It's about acting with empathy, care and helpfulness to others, and to oneself. Kindness isn’t just being "nice.” It’s about making a positive impact on the lives of others, including those who are different from us, through sincere actions and genuine desire to make a difference.
It could be a simple act of saying good morning, waving at someone in greeting, wishing someone a good day. Or it could be more involved. I recall asking my grandmother why Southerners always offered their guests something to eat no matter what time of day they were visiting. She said it came from the Great Depression in the early 20th century when you never knew the last time your visitors had a good meal. To help them while protecting their pride from having to ask for food, if you had extra food, you always offered it to your guests anytime day or night. To me, that’s a perfect example of kindness that we as individuals, communities and our country need to get back.
Coming to back to the present, I watched a video of the television program On the Road recently where they talked about schools showing some of their episodes to young kids to show acts of kindness and inspire them to replicate these positive social behaviors. The team with On the Road created a program and group online site called Kindness 101 to help support educators with integrating programming into their classroom lessons on positive social behaviors and kindness. Even one staff member at a senior home said they use On the Road episodes showing random acts of kindness in our society to give elder residents a positive sense of hope for the future of our country and world. I’m thinking we all could benefit from a Kindness 101 course to help us return to being a kinder society and country.
It requires all of us, acting individually and collectively, to take small actions each day to embrace kindness towards others, especially to those we may otherwise disagree with or are very different from. Of course there are those individuals with whom kindness will never work. And I’m not being naive about it. But wherever we can embrace and test out acts of kindness, the more positive impacts on our world happen.
I encourage each of you to reflect on your stories and moments of kindness you experienced or showed to others. How did it make you feel? What were the benefits? And how can you continue to embrace acts of kindness. I truly believe that by embracing more kindness and empathy in our communities and country, the closer we come to making our country kind again, creating opportunities and positive outcomes for each and every one of us. Reflect on your story of kindness and ways being kind now makes you feel and helps you and our communities and country because as always, Your Story Matters.
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLJzm9BhU_wL9co3T1JYzfld3xtL3_kKnA&si=lAC6jCXL8aNw12x5
https://www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/steve-hartman-on-the-road-kindness-101-teacher-facebook-group/